One Revolutionary Thing That Changed My Marriage

My husband and I make a habit of getting away together several times a year. These romantic getaways are typically long weekends, and most every year we also travel somewhere to stay for seven to ten days. This exclusive “couple time” away began twenty years ago when my father gifted us a trip to Hawaii for our tenth wedding anniversary. Before then, we only had taken a few overnight trips but never for longer than a night or two. We had not realized what we had been missing! That Hawaiian vacation was the one revolutionary thing that changed my marriage.

Once we were in Hawaii, we realized how vital this “alone time” was for our relationship. We cherished the time given to talk, dream, wonder, and focus on our marriage without the distractions of children, responsibilities, and work. There was space to enjoy lazy mornings, eat only when we were hungry, wander around, rest, be romantic, and indulge on excursions we could not have done had we brought the kids. That trip to Hawaii launched our annual couples-only holidays ❤

 

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For the last two decades, one of our marriage goals is to make sure we get away yearly for one bigger trip and a few small ones. Sometimes we are only away for an overnight stay nearby, or I may tag along on a business trip, and we tack a few days on either end. On other occasions, we intentionally plan longer stays further away from home.

We have traveled throughout California (our home state), stayed in all-inclusive resorts in Mexico and Jamaica, flown to the Hawaiian Islands, taken a Caribbean cruise, and visited Europe multiple times. Every time we visit someplace new, we always say it is our new favorite place. ☺These are trips we save for throughout the year, and we make these times away a priority.

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Last month we returned to one of our local “favorites” for a long weekend. This romantic inn is a perfect spot for us for a mini-vacation. The drive isn’t far, and we love the area. Our love story began in Santa Barbara, so naturally, we love returning there for a getaway. We walked to almost everywhere from the Inn except for Montecito.

Warning: this post is photo heavy!

Our Getaway

The Inn:

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Where We Ate:

The Inn served a beautiful breakfast delivered to our room every morning.

Savoy Café– We had a late lunch at this café. We eat here almost anytime we are in town

Finch and Fork– We stopped in here for cocktails and small bites

Tré Lune– A lovely Italian restaurant in Montecito

Sandbar– Great nachos!

Lilac Pâtisserie– Another favorite for pastries, lunch, and dessert

Where We Stopped:

Mission Rose Garden– When the roses are in bloom, the fragrance is incredible, and the roses are stunning!

Alice Keck Park– My husband and I used to picnic at the spot when in college.

State Street– We strolled down State Street from our Inn all the way to the ocean.

Stearns Wharf– This pier is fun to walk down.

Montecito– We enjoy wandering in and out of the boutiques and shops here.

Butterfly Beach– This gorgeous beach is great for sunning, swimming, or walking.

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I hope in sharing a bit of why we travel alone as a couple may encourage you to do the same. These times away are genuinely treasured and so valuable for our marriage. Honestly, it revolutionized our relationship. You do not need to travel to far-away places to get time alone. Often hotels in your area will offer local’s specials. It was not always easy saving for these holidays or even finding childcare, but we made it work. With some careful planning, you can do this, too!